Ok… let’s get a few things straight. I’m 23, I’ve never owned a house, I’ve only just flown the nest, and the prospect of being a ‘grown up’ and renting is a scary one.

Feel like you know me?

No? Well, I’m 5 foot 2, and look suspiciously like the picture of me to the right.

Better?

Good.

So then, this new fangled property website comes along to me and asks me to write for them. Are you thinking what I’m thinking? Apart from rubbish puns, like the title, and inaccurate stick men self portraits, I have relatively little to offer, right?

Well I hope not, because otherwise this would be a very short article. I am “The first time buyer”. According to Google images, I look like this. Only we know that’s wrong. We’ve seen a picture of me, and I don’t own a tiny little house that I carry around with me. But tiny house, or no tiny house, I personally believe Estate Agents have this sixth sense when it comes to first time buyers. They smell the fear on us. They know that really we don’t have a big enough deposit saved up, they know we don’t know exactly what we’re looking for, and above all else, they know they can pull the wool over our eyes. However, with a shock of tangerine coloured hair like mine, the wool might be better served over their eyes.

So what has this article taught us?

1. I can’t draw very well in ‘Paint’
2. Estate agents have a very good sense of smell and…
3. I can’t even think of three worthwhile things to put in a list.

So now that you know me, you can, if you want to (I’m not forcing you, honest) follow my trials and tribulations on my quest to one day become a property owner. Hopefully I’ll learn something along this path.

If I don’t, I’ll just paint you pretty pictures.

P.S I would like to add that, unlike my drawing, in real life my head is attached to my body.